Several years ago I took my young daughters to their annual well check ups together. I believe their ages were 13 and 8. So while the 8 year old still believed I hung the moon and was always right, the 13 year old was beginning to act and think… well… 13. This was the start of the eye rolling, loud sigh phase that many know and love in their own parenting experiences. As the appointment for daughter number one wrapped up, I was asked about an OPTIONAL vaccination and I politely declined, not having done enough reading on my own (I do not like to make decisions under pressure and usually will not, particularly as it pertains to my kids). Immediately the glasses came down and she looked at me and said, “Mom, can we have a discussion about this? Can you tell me what reservations you have about this particular vaccine?”
Fair enough question and had the interrogation stopped there and she actually let me answer, it may have served to be a very enlightening discussion in which I had chosen to proceed. But that isn’t how things went down. Before I could answer her question, she launched into a long litany of reasons why I needed to make this (optional) decision to get this vaccine for my daughter TODAY… at this very visit and if I didn’t, I was really being naive and unreasonable.
I stuck to my initial decision and walked out feeling not like someone who knew a thing or two about the medical world, but rather an ignorant and uneducated mom who was needlessly putting my daughter in harm’s way. As we drove away, my daughter chimed from the back seat, “Mom, why aren’t you letting me get that shot? The doctor said it would protect me.”
I could feel the rage bubble up. Not because this person disagreed with me. Not at all, but because she undermined me in such a way in front of my children that my daughter now had doubts about my competence when it came to her own well being. I stopped the car, turned around and looked at her and said, “No one… not a single person outside of Dad and me, has more concern for your health and wellbeing. That doctor cannot POSSIBLY care more about your health and your life than I do. I promise you that.” To avoid any hand raising, I will disclose that this was not one of those vaccines you get to protect others.
We stayed with this group for a little while and I eventually switched our whole family. I now deal with a practitioner who is willing to listen, have a conversation, consider my thoughts, give me hers and ultimately, respect my decision making. I have taken many of her recommendations to heart, knowing that in her clinical and professional judgement, she believes it best. This is Pray for those in RCIA Our RCIA catechumens (Tiffani Behymer, Mariah Spitznagel & Larry Stroop) and candidates (Jill Brinck, Don Evans, Michelle Evans, Ryan Nicley, Jared Olson, Ben Pulda & Kerry Warner) will participate in the Rite of Sending at the 12 noon Mass at St. Ignatius then the Rite of Election and Continuing Conversion with Archbishop Schnurr (or his delegate) at the cathedral on Sunday, February 18. Please pray for all of them during this season of purification and enlightenment. Also, pray for all of the others that God is calling into His Church, and be ready to invite those around you to become Catholic. The harvest is abundant, but the laborers are few (Luke 10:2)! Several people already plan to enter RCIA next year – many people are just waiting to be invited! Are we inviting them? the best case scenario we could have… and I believe is how things are meant to be. We have a doctor with the education and experience to back up her incredible and diverse knowledge base who also likes to partner with her patients in their care. She knows more than I do… of that I am certain. But she doesn’t want better for me or my children than I do. Of that SHE is certain.
I suppose this was a very long winded way of disclosing that I have decided to leave my position at St. Ignatius and pursue an advanced practice degree in nursing. Over the years in the clinical setting and then in my short time at Pregnancy Center West, I have discovered that there is a true need to partner with those for whom we care and accompany them along to greater freedom from disease not just of the body, but of the soul also. Many of the young girls who present to the center have never been told that they have dignity and worth and no matter their family or social conditions, they are worthy of respect in the highest regard. It is soul crushing to encounter a very young teen girl who has had multiple sexual partners. Has anyone told her she doesn’t need to give herself away? Or have those entrusted with her medical care simply shaken their heads, written her off and handed her a prescription for birth control pills because, well, she’s going to do it anyway? I’m sure the former exists, but the latter is far too common and for that reason, I am going to battle for the young women whom God so desperately loves. I hope to shed some light on their beauty, dignity and worth in the eyes of their Almighty Father.
I humbly ask for your prayers as I advance in line and get on board God’s roller coaster of life. A good name for an amusement park ride such as this might be the Ultimate Sweet Surrender (a deceptive name for all the scary twists and turns that take place on this ride!).
May God bless you and keep you and your families safe this year.
Kate Rewwer
Parish Health Coordinator
